For those who may not know me personally, I love to read. Although many of the books are about finance and investing, I learn a lot from reading other topics as well. The self-help books inspire me to do more with my life and the autobiographies/memoirs from celebrities allow me to escape my own reality and delve deep enough into their world that I can learn from their struggles and share in their triumphs.
One of the books I just finished was You are a Badass by Jen Sincero. It’s a New York Times Bestseller and was suggested by someone I trust so I decided to check it out. The book was great and there are some key life lessons we could all glean from it. Here are 5 of the key takeaways below:
1. “Our thoughts become our words, our words become our beliefs, our beliefs become our actions, our actions become our habits, and our habits become our realities.” In other words: You are in control of your destiny. What you end up doing and accomplishing in your life depends a great deal on what you believe is possible. What you believe is possible depends on what you tell yourself and what you think about yourself each day. If you want to change your reality, change your thoughts and beliefs. For me, that means saying positive words of affirmation each morning. It means reading devotionals and inspirational stories that help open my mind to what is possible. I tell myself I am smart and intelligent to help increase my confidence before heading to work each day. I tell myself that I will approach every situation as an opportunity to grow so I can view situations more positively. I tell myself that I am loved so I never doubt my self-worth. What things do you tell yourself? What beliefs do you have? What thoughts do you think? Your answers will shape your reality.
2. “Do yourself a favor and use irritating situations and people as opportunities for growth, not pain.” We have all been in numerous situations, either at work or at home, that have been irritating or annoying. Perhaps one of our co-workers is being unreasonable, one of your children refuses to stop talking, or you come home to a messy kitchen that you just cleaned the day before. Instead of letting these situations frustrate you or put you in a negative mood, why not use them as an opportunity to grow? Whenever I have hard days or a series of negative things happen in my life, I change my thinking and view it as a “character-building” opportunity. Instead of lamenting subpar situations, use them as a chance to grow.
3. “Procrastination is one of the most popular forms of self-sabotage.” There is no guarantee that you’ll have time tomorrow to do the things you are putting off today. Something may come up or take precedence that you didn’t expect. Don’t delay on your dreams. Don’t keep pushing off your goals. Recognize that there is no time like the present. Are there things you want to accomplish before you get married or have children? Are there things you want to do before you reach middle-age? Come up with a plan to start working on them now. You don’t want to look back on your life a year from now or 5 years from now and have regrets. Don’t delay on your destiny.
4. “Don't answer the phone or reply to texts while you're busy. Other people's needs can occupy several lifetimes' worth of our attention, and if you let them, they will.” Prioritize yourself. Set boundaries for yourself. Protect your time. If you are working on a creative project then put your phone away, dig your heels into the ground, and focus on the task at hand. While you can be available to others numerous times throughout the day, it is also important to carve out time for yourself that you can use to focus or recharge. If you constantly allow other people’s phone calls, text messages, and social media alerts to distract you, you will delay your own progress and find yourself engulfed in other people’s problems and issues. Put yourself first.
5. “The people you surround yourself with are excellent mirrors for who you are and how much, or how little, you love yourself.” Be mindful of the company you keep. Your friends are a reflection of the values you cherish. Are you around people who are of good character and who constantly strive to do the right thing? Are you around people who challenge you to view things with a different perspective, who are givers, who are ambitious? If not, re-examine your friend group. You will become like the people you hang around most. If you do don’t like who you’d become, then change your friends. Add people to your inner circle who challenge you, inspire you, and motivate you to be a better version of yourself.